LIME TREE EXPERIMENT FAILURE, YO: lessons on making progress in the search for a fruit with a good taste using less water » Y G H M®: the stories, yo
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LIME TREE EXPERIMENT FAILURE, YO: lessons on making progress in the search for a fruit with a good taste using less water

LIME TREE EXPERIMENT FAILURE, YO: lessons on making progress in the search for a fruit with a good taste using less water

“It’s not the worst title for a book, yo”, I explain to Bilta as I lean back on my couch in my living room, “but, I still think that you have room to improve it.”

“How so?”, he replies as he pulls the digital.lever to recline the plastic chair, “what are you thinking? I am open to suggestions–areas to improve.  Things that we can do better–what are you thinking for a change, yo?”

“I would like to see you be more expressive in your title–it lacks luster.  I want you to consider that the audience will have a wow or a not wow response to what you put forth.  You want to consider which of these two ways that you want them to go–impress or leave?”

“Where would I go?”, he replies.

“To the kitchen”, digital.Bilfty2.1 yells at the digital.TV, “the answer is to the kitchen.”

I sigh; I roll my eyes; it never ends.

“So anyways”, I continue speaking to Bilta, “what I’m thinking is that you need to consider writing from a communication standpoint–you are both creating a message and specifying it to a certain audience.”

“Who is that, yo?”

“Well”, I reply as I shrug, “you tell me–who are the people, directly, in your life?  That is whom you are communicating with–what you want to consider when you are talking.  Both the education level and the experience–it’s a slippery slope but you need to really consider that not everyone is your fan.  You need to be aware that there are people, obviously, with allegience to other people.”

“What?”, Bilta replies as he turns his head to me, “what’s that mean?”

I lean forward and pick up my soda; I take a sip; it’s cold just like I like it.

“So anyways”, I continue speaking as I set the digital.can on the small wooden table, “you have the direct audience and also the passive audience; that means that both people that you are talking to and, also, other people, like digital.Bilfty2.1–that loser.”

“I can hear you!”, he replies as he turns his head to me, “words hurt, yo.”

“That’s my point!”, I exclaim as I lean forward and pick up my soda again, “they did–but, you’ll be alright.  What I mean is that you want to hit people both directly and indirectly–where the message is clear but, also, they can tell if you are being sincere.”

I take another sip of soda; it’s less cold but I can still drink it.

“So like, Bilta”, I continue as I turn my head to the TV, “you ever had a digital.amor?”

“What’s that, boss?”, he replies as he turns his head to the digital.TV, “like… what do you mean?”

“I mean”, I respond as I pause for a moment, “that you need to learn how to talk to a pretty lady while being a gentleman and her hero.”

“Huh?”, he replies as he turns his head back to me, “I have no clue what the fuck you are talking about.”

“Don’t talk to her that way”, I continue speaking as I roll my eyes, “like… don’t talk to her like you just talked to me.”

“Huh?”

“Pick better words and clean up a little when you speak to her”, I respond as I sip my soda, “but, don’t change when you are around here.  With this being said, like in your book title proposal that you just made–consider making it sexier for the audience.  Add a couple four letter words and aggressive words–people love that; then, make it a good book that explains details better. Use the title to get the audience–then, causally, like a word ninja, interject a couple ideas mixed with a bunch of bullshit.”

“Huh?”

“Try this for the title:

I SUCK AT LEMON TREE FARMING: a true tale of bravery and other stupid shit that I did one time

Digital.Bilfty2.1 turns his head to me.

“That’s funny”, he replies as he chuckles.

“Well”, I reply as I turn my head back to the TV, “there you go–the secret to success is just to try and get them to laugh, a little.”

“That makes sense”, Bilta replies as he types the words on his digital.laptop.

“It’s”, I continue speaking as I roll my eyes, “also, the, real, secret to life.”



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